My Experience in Foster Care Helped Shape My Future

If you asked me ten years ago, whether I thought my experience in foster care would have a positive impact on my future today, I would’ve said no.  At the time, I thought there was no way something so life-altering, challenging, and confusing could impact me in any way that wasn’t detrimental. How could I take something that felt terrible in the moment, and turn it into something good?

Growing up, I felt like a case number. Another file that landed on my caseworker’s desk that would eventually fade into the pile they received earlier that week. It wasn’t until I recognized how much power there was in my foster care experience that I was able to acknowledge how that wasn’t true. My life didn’t equate to a case number, it never did. I was so much more than that. There was power in my experience.

My truth. My story.

It didn’t need to define me or my future, but it could help shape it.

Foster care gave me the courage to have a voice. To recognize that there is a powerful, strong, and courageous person lying beneath the challenges I’ve faced. A person who is capable of advocating for my needs. A person who is capable of taking on whatever challenges life throws at me. A person who is worthy of giving and receiving love. A person who can dream big and achieve whatever I set my mind to.

Toward the end of my time in care, I was assigned a caseworker who empowered me to speak my truth. She encouraged me to use my voice and advocate for what I wanted. A moment that I think about often, is when she encouraged me to advocate for separate court hearings from my siblings. I loved my siblings, but because we shared court dates, I struggled to get my voice heard by the judge. 

With her help and encouragement, I was able to speak up at my next court date and request my own hearings. That single event had a domino effect. From that point forward, I started getting more comfortable with speaking up. This was useful as it helped me navigate the many challenges in care, but it still plays a major role in my life today. Now, when I feel my needs aren’t being met, I speak up with no hesitation. I recognize that my voice deserves to be heard and that my needs matter. Learning to advocate for my needs wasn’t easy, but with the support and encouragement I received while I was in care, I was able to work on this skill for years to come.

Foster care taught me how to be resilient.

Being in care can come with unique challenges. For me, some of the challenges I faced back then left me feeling different than my friends who weren’t in foster care. Luckily, I had a caregiver who was able to provide me with emotional support during these times. She created an open environment for me to communicate my frustrations and lean on her for support. She helped me process what I was feeling and come up with a game plan. Now in moments of adversity, I look back at those moments and sit with myself. I process what I’m feeling and if it becomes too much, I reach out for support.

Foster care taught me that I’m worthy.

My experiences in care solidified that I deserve all that life has to offer. The relationships I formed with my foster siblings and the adults in my life reinforced that I am capable of being loved, fully. They reminded me that being in foster care wasn’t some fault of my own, but rather something that would serve as a catalyst for change. Since aging out, I’ve spent a large amount of my time advocating for better after-care services for young people transitioning out of care and encouraging youth to speak out.

In challenging moments, my hope for all youth is to remember that foster care isn’t their story. It’s a single chapter. Use that chapter to your advantage. Seek out the support and guidance you need to ensure the rest of your story is everything you’ve dreamed of.

If you asked me today if foster care had a positive impact on my life, I’d say yes.

 

About the Author:
Kat works in healthcare and advocacy. As a former youth with lived experience, one of her biggest goals is to uplift youth voices within the child welfare system and influence policy to reflect better outcomes for youth in care. Her passions surround everything related to the art of storytelling.