My Journey into Supervised Independent Living Program (SILP)

From Foster Care to Freedom: Guiding the Next Chapter Series

Growing up in foster care can shape your life in ways that other people may never see. I was placed in care at 14 years old and spent a couple of years going to different residential programs, a place full of routines, rules, staff, and chaos. Don’t get me wrong, I learned a lot in placement, so it wasn’t all bad, but it never fully felt like I was home. So, when I turned 18, I began the process of moving into a SILP, which was both exciting and intimidating.

The Interview Process: Proving You’re Ready

Before I moved into my first SILP, I had to go through an interview process. During the interview, they’re pretty much deciding whether you’re ready to live independently. The interview can feel stressful; they ask you questions about budgeting, work, school, cooking, and cleaning, but you just need to be honest.

After living in a place where staff made most of your decisions for you, it felt weird trying to convince a bunch of people that I could run my own life. I didn’t want to seem unprepared, but I realized that the interview wasn’t about having everything figured out; it was about figuring out what kind of support I needed so that I wasn’t just thrown into adulthood.

Freedom & Responsibility

When I was discharged from residential placement at 18, I moved into my first SILP apartment, and honestly, it didn’t feel real. There were no staff checking on me, no schedule posted- just quiet. For the first time in what felt like forever, I could make my own decisions, what I wanted to eat, what I wanted to wear, and what my day was going to look like.

The thing is, moving into SILP doesn’t just mean you gain freedom; you also gain responsibility. You’re cleaning your space, managing meetings with workers, learning skills like cooking, cleaning, and budgeting. You’re going to make mistakes; it’s just a part of growing into adulthood. SILP is meant to give you room to figure things out. I learned how to rely on myself while also allowing space for help when I needed it.

When You Don’t Use the Support You’re Given

Something a lot of us don’t want to talk about is what happens when you don’t take advantage of the support that’s available to you. In SILP, the help is there, but it’s not forced onto you like it is in a residential or group home.

When you ignore that support, the consequences can get real, fast. You might start to fall behind on bills, and eventually, you might not even have a stable living situation. I know a lot of youth who didn’t take these programs seriously and ended up either getting sent back to more restrictive placements or became homeless because they allowed themselves to spiral too far. Emotionally, that can make you feel like you’re failing when really, you just need guidance.

Using the resources that are available to you, like Independent Living Specialist workers, budgeting help, and basic help learning life-skills, can be the difference between successfully transitioning into your own apartment and feeling overwhelmed or unprepared.

Still Learning, Still Growing

SILP taught me that being independent doesn’t start when you turn 18; it’s something you build slowly. Some days will feel good, while others will be overwhelming, but the journey is what will make you more resilient and confident in yourself. SILP gives you a chance to practice adulthood with some extra support. It doesn’t necessarily show you how to survive on your own; it teaches you to trust yourself with your own life and be proud of how far you’ve come. That’s something you’ll carry with you long after you leave care.

Resources:

Information about Supervised Setting Programs: https://ocfs.ny.gov/programs/youth/supervised.php

Other NYS Independent Living Support: https://www.casanys.org/independent-living-skills

Information about the Foster Youth College Success Initiative (FYCSI): https://ocfs.ny.gov/programs/youth/fycsi.php